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Parenting Options & Costs

Below is the list of of some methods of how many LGBTQ+ families are formed. Let’s also not forget that blended families can be formed by people co-parenting; providing foster care for or adopting; or by individuals with children from current or past relationships.

Adoption is one of the ways on becoming a parent in Singapore. Under the new Singapore’s Adoption of Children Act 2022, openly LGBTQ+ individuals are no longer allowed to adopt. Apart from it being a long process with various home studies and interviews, priority is normally given to married heterosexual couples.

This is a common choice for lesbian mothers where two primary treatment options are usually available:

Intrauterine insemination (IUI)

It is when a female is fertilised with donor sperm injected through a syringe.

Costs: SGD 1,500 – SGD 5,000 (excluding sperm sources)

In vitro fertilisation (IVF)

It is when mature eggs are collected from ovaries and fertilised by sperm in a lab. The fertilised embryos are then transferred into a woman’s uterus that result might result in a pregnancy.

Costs: SGD 10,000 – SGD 15,000 (per cycle)

Process (Females):

  1. A good first step is to take a Fertility & Reproductive screening at a singapore clinic before proceed.
  2. Engage a fertility clinic to ascertain the most suitable method to use such as IUI or IVF.
  3. Decide on the source of your sperm donor. Some common options are close male friends, anonymous donors from matching websites or clinic assistance.
  4. Dependant on the method used, prepare your body for daily injections of about 10 – 14 days for ovarian stimulation. (a process commonly known as Super ovulation or SO). The goal is to try to produce more than 1 egg to increase the chance of a successful pregnancy.  (do note that this is where different private doctors with their different protocols differ. Local Public hospital protocols tend to avoid ovarian stimulation for IUI procedure.
  5. Do be informed that the injections can take it’s toll on your body so be well prepared for it.
  6. Insert the sperm either via IUI or IVF.
  7. Results of your pregnancy will be out in 2 weeks. (also known as the two week wait, TTW!) . If unsuccessful, repeat step 4 or 5. If successful, congratulations on becoming a parent.
  8. Child born in Singapore automatically receives Singaporean citizenship at birth if the birth mother is a singaporean.

Process (Males):

This is a common choice for gay fathers where a surrogate is a woman who assists with carrying the baby to term using an egg donor through IVF.

Costs: SGD 120,000 – SGD 250,000 (usually dependant on the country)

  1. Surrogacy processes may vary from country to country so ensure that you have done your research before embarking on this journey.
  2. Be prepared of the financial and emotional toll throughout your process which may take 24 months or longer.
  3. A good first step is to go for a semen analysis to ensure you are not infertile and that your sperm count/heath is acceptable for IVF treatments.
  4. Engage a surrogacy agency that may provide services such as matching & screening egg donors & surrogates, counselling, sourcing for IVF clinics, obtaining insurances, legal work and more.
  5. Agency will screen and match you to an egg donor based on your requirements and start the ovarian stimulation process.
  6. An egg retrieval procedure is performed where variable eggs are combined with your sperm to form embryos that will be genetically tested and frozen for future use by the surrogate.
  7. Agency will screen and match you to a surrogate/s and perform the necessary medical checks such as the thickness of her endometrium, which is the lining of the uterine wall in preparation for the IVF implantation.
  8. Once the surrogate endometrium is checked and prepared, embryo/s can be implanted that may develop into a fetus.
  9. Results of your pregnancy will be out in 2 weeks. If successful, congratulations on becoming a parent/s. If unsuccessful, repeat steps 4 & 5 (cases with no remaining embryos left) or steps 6 & 7 (with embryos left).
  10. Once your child is ready to be delivered usually from week 38 onwards, you need to consider which citizenship the child acquires at birth and how the child can obtain a passport to travel back to Singapore.
  11. It is IMPORTANT TO NOTE that your child will NOT be granted Singapore citizenship at birth and you will likely face many challenges obtaining any long term visas due to the child being born out of wedlock.
  12. Please seek guidance from a family lawyer.